The Edge of Seventeen
by iKillFangirlsForFun
Summary: The story of Fiona Coyne and Eli Goldsworthy, and how they progress into something as simple as a friendship to maybe something more.
1. Running to the Edge of the World

**A/N: **I must say that I hate Charlie. I don't think she was ever right for Fiona. The fact that she dumped Fiona because she's an alcoholic was ridiculous. Fiona deserves so much better than that. And because of that episode I have come up with this.

I understand that the characters aren't completely the same as they are in the show, but that's why this is called fan** fiction**; not fan **faction**. Anyway, I changed a lot of what's been going on with Fiona, and Eli with the whole Charlie and Imogen (gag) thing(s). I just think the show would be better off this way… a lot better off. So please read, enjoy, and if you liked it leave a review. And don't worry there will be plenty of other chapters. So, please, please no flames. Don't give me any "Oh, Eli loves Clare, and only Clare, boo-frickity-hoo." Don't get me wrong, I love me some eClare. Again, this is fan **fiction**.

**This story is rated: **M for language, sensuality, late in the story sexuality, and partial nudity *lawlz*

_Italics:_ third person, but there is hardly anything in this story in third person. I just had to use it for a little part that's all.

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><p><strong>Running to the Edge of the World <strong>

**By: thekiddiegrinder**

Tonight was awful. Charlie doesn't want to be with me because of my past. I know I've made mistakes before, and I regret them, but somehow they've made me stronger. I really thought that Charlie and I would be together… wait, make it together. I really had feelings for her, but they were different than any feelings I've had before. It was special… even if it was just for awhile. Everyone makes mistakes, I'm sure she has made plenty in her life. I thought she'd accept me, I thought she would be different than the rest. She told me that I should've told her earlier, but I thought about this, over and over, and I think even if I had told her sooner in the relationship, she would've left me right then and there. I told her that I would accept that fact that she drinks, it's part of her life, she's in college, and everyone in college drinks at least a little, but I'm okay with that. I don't get why I had to drink, too, just because she did.

There was something that Charlie did that didn't make sense to me, not even a little bit. It confused me more than anything has. She was surprised at me being an alcoholic at the age of seventeen. I'm still seventeen, and she offered me a drink. It was kind of ridiculous, actually. Whatever. I shouldn't even be analyzing everything like this. If she can't accept my mistakes, then she doesn't deserve me, my time or my love.

I sat in this house for only a few minutes after Charlie left, and I couldn't stand being there. The entire place had this terrible, negative, and horrid vibe. I needed to get out of there. I didn't have anywhere to go, so I wasn't completely sure of where I was going, who I was going to talk to or if I wanted to speak to a person at all. I ran outside, and down the street, not stopping, just running. I couldn't stop. Tears were trickling down my cheeks. I thought about how much bad luck I had with guys, now girls, too? I'm just a jinx, and nothing more than that.

I finally stopped. I was out of breath, my heart was pounding, and it wasn't until a few minutes when I realized that I was near a bridge. The wind was making the water crash under me, splashing against the rocks. I shivered from the cold. Tears were still streaming down my cheeks. I sniffled, and choked on my tears, as I slowly lifted my right leg over the edge of the bridge. I sniffled again, holding the rail tightly with my hands, I carefully lifted the left leg. I stood there at the very edge of the bridge. Sobbing, wanting life to end, wanting the bad luck to stop. I took a deep breath, cleared the tears away, and closed my eyes.

I tried to concentrate on the moment, but I couldn't. Cars are driving around, honking, making unnecessary noises. It's impossible to concentrate this way. I thought about jumping into the water. I knew it was shallow, and if I jumped as soon as I'd hit the water I would die instantly. I wasn't afraid of dying, and then I didn't care if I did or not… I just didn't want to exist anymore.

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><p><em>It seemed like time just stretched on, and on for her. Even with the noises, the talking from people in the distance, she couldn't think about anything other than just wanting to jump. She slowly, and carefully, put a foot in front of her, letting it dangle off the high edge from the water.<em>

_Only just a few hundred feet away was Eli, having a peaceful night stroll on his motorcycle. He was by himself, and he liked it that way. These past few weeks had taken a huge toll on him. His accident, the painful break up with Clare, the therapists, the constant prescriptions, he just needed to drive around in peace. He needed a drama-free zone for once. He turned the corner, which was about a forty yards away, as soon as his bike made such a sharp turn he saw someone standing by the bridge. First, he thought the person was just standing there, looking into the water, but as soon as he realized that whoever it was, was actually on the edge of it, looking like they were going to jump. He got closer, and his eyes widened, his heart beat increasing._

"_Fiona!" He yelled, he parked his bike, and ran towards her._

_Fiona opened her eyes, seeing Eli running towards her._

"_Don't even try to stop me, Eli," she said quietly, looking at the water. She closed her eyes_

_Eli stood next to her, "This isn't the way, Fiona. Believe me… I would know."_

"_Eli, I have to, it's better this way."_

"_No, it isn't. It never is better this way."_

"_No one cares about a jinx."_

"_I care about you."_

_Fiona looked at Eli, her eyes flooded with tears. She just stared at him, looking into his emerald eyes._

"_Come on, this isn't the way," he offered his hand to her, "Take my hand."_

"_Eli…" Fiona whispered, "Have you ever felt like you're never going to find that person that makes you feel worth something, like you have a purpose in life?"_

_Eli went silent, and instantly thought of Clare. How bad of luck he had with girls, too._

"_All the time," he replied. _

_Fiona felt not so alone anymore, and reached for Eli's hand. He quickly pulled her over the edge, and hugged her close to his chest. She just stood there, in Eli's arms for a few minutes, just crying hard in his chest._

_Eli stroked her hair, and held her as long as she needed to be held. Suddenly, Eli felt a drop of water hit the top of his head. The drop trickled down his forehead, and landed on Fiona's nose. Eli smirked a little as she jumped from the surprise of the water. She wiped it on Eli's shirt, and Eli let out a soft chuckle. Fiona forced a giggle._

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><p>I felt something inside of me that wanted to burst out. I didn't know what it was or how to express it, but whatever the feeling was, it wanted out, and I knew I hadn't felt that way in awhile. All I knew at this point was that I felt safe around him - wanted, cared for. He said it would be alright. And suddenly I felt right at home. The hug broke away, but we were still very close.<p>

"Do you want me to give you a ride home?" He asked, sliding his hands in his pockets, his shoulders a bit slumped over.

I didn't want to go home at all. I knew if I did then I would stay there all night, crying about how much Charlie left me over something so ridiculous, and stupid.

"No, I don't want to go home," my voice low, and my eyes shifted to the ground.

"Where do you want to go? Wherever it is I'll be more than happy to drive you there."

"Just anywhere, but home."

"I have an idea," he said, the left side of his lips curved into a smirk.

"What idea?"

He just kissed my cheek with a smile, and said, "Let's go." I felt a rush go through me like lightening. I could feel myself blushing, it was either of embarrassment or that I was surprised that I hadn't freaked out by a guy placing his lips on me… wait, it was much more than that.

He walked away from me, and realized that I was still standing there in awe– more like an idiot.

"You coming or what?" He asked, kind of smirking that famous smirk.

I didn't say anything, all I did was nod like a deer caught in the headlights. I heard his footsteps getting closer, and before I knew it he was closer to me than he had been before, even during his comforting hug. He just looked down at me, and smirked flirtatiously. I could feel his eyes on me, more like digging, and searching through my soul, my heart, my pain. I felt his cold fingers interlock with mine, and right at that moment it started to rain lightly. We both heard thunder, and he squeezed my hand tighter.

He chuckled nervously, and practically dragged me over to his motorcycle.

He pulled out an helmet, and said as he smirked as he tossed it to me, and I made a slight _oomph _sound, "Try this on for size, girlie."

I let out a soft chuckle, and put the helmet on. I imagined myself looking like an idiot, mostly because he kept smirking, and chuckling at me.

"What?" I said, kind of embarrassed.

He shook his head, "Nothing." He got on his bike.

But I knew it was definitely something, "Right," I said in a flat tone.

"Just get on the damn bike," he ordered with a gentle titter.

I stood next to the bike, although it was only just sprinkling, the seat was wet. I stared at the seat, not wanting to really sit there, because as any girl thinks I don't want it to look or feel like I just peed. He looked at me, and noticed what I was staring at. He got off his motorcycle, took off his jacket, and wiped the seat dry.

"There, now you can get on," he smiled as if he were proud of himself.

I smiled back, "That was sweet, thank you."

He nodded. Just nodded, I smiled again. I hurriedly got on the bike, and wrapped my arms lightly around his waist.

He turned his head towards me, and said with a smile, "Better hold on."

I felt this rushing sensation combined with an uneasy feeling. I placed my arms lightly around him.

He turned on the ignition, revving it loudly… it gave me quivers. The only thing I rode close to a motorcycle was a scooter. Suddenly, the thought of Charlie came into my head once again. The feeling I was having with Eli went away as soon as Charlie entered my mind. I needed her out of my head, so I attempted to make a conversation with Eli as we waited for the bike to warm up.

"So, how far is… where ever we are going from here?" He didn't answer me, all he did was rev the engine insanely loud, and I squeezed his waist tighter. He seemed oddly pleased like he meant to do it. And I thought, oh great, this is going to be the scariest ride I've ever been on, but with him here next to me I would be less scared because I know he wouldn't let anything bad happen to me.

Quickly, the bike took off into the street. With every car he swerved passed, I got more scared. This isn't anything like a scooter. Just to scare me, (and I know it was on purpose) he did a wheelie. A frickin' wheelie!

I gasped, clutched tight to his waist, and asked nervously, my voice shaky, "How much further is it?"

He replied, "Don't you worry, you have a ride headed for you."

I could hear the smirk in his retort. And just with that, he revved the engine louder, and went faster.

It started raining harder, and I closed my eyes, resting my head on the back of his shoulder to shield my face from the cold, piercing rain. I tried to move my mind from the whole Charlie mess, but whatever I thought of somehow lead to her. Everything reminded me of her, everything.

The bike slowed down, feeling like we were only going two miles per hour. He placed his hand on mine, and patted it gently - comfortingly. He stopped patting my hand, but left it there upon mine.

He turned his head towards me, and whispered, "Are you still scared?"

I shook my head, but obviously, he couldn't hear that.

"Hmm?" He made a noise.

"No, no, I'm fine," I replied.

He once again intertwined our fingers. I smiled.

He pulled into a driveway, with a wide white garage door. The house made of bricks, and it was rather larger than most homes I've seen around the town. He turned the engine off, and we got off the bike, with our hands still together. We got to the a door, and took keys out of his pocket. Then I figured out instantly that this was his house, when he put the keys in the door.

"Why is the door locked?" I asked.

He said, "Home alone. Cici and Bullfrog are on vacation."

"Without you?" I asked, confused.

"Didn't want to go," he said quickly, unlocking the door.

"Why?" I asked, the door swung open.

He looked into my eyes, and said, "I'd miss you too much, Fi," he walked into the house, and turned on the hallway light.

I just stood there on the porch, blushing, but also confused. What did he mean by that? What the hell?

He looked behind him, at me, and said sarcastically, "You're gonna stand there all night or what?" He laughed.

"Maybe," I said playfully, trying to play it cool.

BOOM!

The thunder struck, and I ran inside like the coward I am. I ran into Eli's arms, and squeezed tightly, burying my face in his chest. All he did was laugh, and seemed pleased yet again. This kid has issues. He wrapped his arms around me, and kissed the top of my head.

"You hungry?"

"Maybe…" I whispered. Still holding onto him for dear life.

"I'll take that as a yes," he said with a slight grin, then walked into the kitchen.

As he walked into the kitchen, I asked from afar, "Well, if I'm forced to be hungry, then could you at least tell me what you're making?" I asked in a playful tone.

He leaned back from the doorway of the kitchen, so I just saw his head, "Food," he replied sarcastically. And leaned forward so that I couldn't see him any longer.

I covered my mouth, and laughed, shaking my head.

He yelled from the kitchen, "Don't do that, your smile is adorable!"

How did he know that I was covering my mouth? Surveillance cameras? No, I don't think so. But maybe, just maybe. I heard a loud crash coming from the kitchen, and ran down the hallway through the swinging door to see what was going on. He was holding his hand, and I saw blood dripping down onto the floor.

"What happened?" I asked in a worried voice

"I guess someone put the plates in the cabinet wrong," making a slight hissing noise from the pain the cuts were causing.

I walked quickly over to him, the cuts were deep, I even knew that from all the way across the kitchen. I attempted to rip off my sleeve to wrap the wound. But I failed, and the entire left side of my shirt ripped with the sleeve.

I wrapped the cloth around his hand, and even though he was in pain, he looked up at me, and chuckled.

"What?" I asked. "Why are you laughing, you're freakin' bleeding!"

"Cute bra," he said, and nibbled on his bottom lip.

"What?" I asked, confused.

His eyes shifted down to my chest. I looked down, and saw the entire left side of my bra. I gasped in horror, and tried, but failed, to cover it up.

Although embarrassed, I kept trying to dress Eli's wound with my now ripped shirt. When I was finished, he took off his shirt, and handed it to me.

"Here, take this," he smirked.

I took the shirt, "Can you turn around, please?"

"Sure, sure…" He said in a low tone, nodding as he turned around.

I took off my ripped shirt, and tossed it in the garbage. From the corner of my eye I could see Eli's eye shift at me. He bit his lip harder than before, and my entire body warmed up. He was staring at me. I was embarrassed? Maybe not, but I wasn't about to say anything anyway. If I had, he might've kicked me out of his house or it would've been awkward all night with me being there. I didn't want awkwardness with him. I didn't know what I wanted, but in a way, I knew I wanted him to like me. He was staring, yeah, but it wasn't in a "you're a piece of meat, and I want to screw you" kind of way. It was like a… I don't know what exactly it was, but it wasn't anything like that. Eli isn't like that, I knew he wasn't.

"Okay, done," I sighed. His shirt was warm, and comfortable. Plus, it had the best smell I've ever smelt in my entire life. I took a deep breath, smelling it. I felt creepy.

He turned around, and looked at me, still biting his lip. I didn't say anything. I just acted as if I didn't notice it.

He let go of his lip, "Still hungry?"

I laughed, "Not after that horror show, I'm not."

BOOM!

The thunder struck again. I jumped. He laughed. Again.

"Aren't you cold?"

"Not really."

I think he was just looking for a reason to stay shirtless. He was showing off. I thought it was kind of cute. Honestly, I kind of thought the way he looked topless was just as cute as him showing off… wait, did I just say a guy was cute? _Hold on, stop the fucking train. What?_

We stood in the kitchen in silence, aside from the pitter-patter of the rain outside, as I stared at his shirtless body.

"You look good in my shirts," he smirked.

"What?" I snapped back, distracted by his chest. "Oh, yeah, I guess… How's your, um, your," I couldn't think of the word. My mind was just foggy with the thought of his half-naked body.

"Hand?" He asked, talking to me like I was two years old.

"Yeah, that thing…" I mentally kicked myself.

"It's much better thanks to you."

"Well, you're welcome. Glad I could be of assistance," I curtsied.

He laughed again, I blushed dark red.

"Glad I could amuse you, Elijah," I said, still incredibly embarrassed.

His eyes traveled down my body, (I'm sure he thought I didn't notice him checking me out) and saw my soaking wet skinny jeans.

"Aren't those a little tight?" He asked.

"A little, since they're wet."

He raised an eyebrow, "Really?"

"No, no!" I yelled, "Not like that!"

He smirked, "Are you sure?"

"Shut up," I demanded playfully.

The house keys were hanging out of Eli's pocket, and they suddenly fell onto the ground. The sound was amplified because we were completely silent. I walked over to pick them up, and as I did, he bent down, too, and our hands collided.

I grabbed them from his hand, and teasingly said, "Ha, I win."

He grabbed my wrist gently, and tried to pry them from my fingers, but my grip got tighter.

"Don't make me tickle you," he raised his voice.

I just stuck my tongue at him, and before I knew it, his hand was on my waist tickling me. I giggled, and finally dropped the keys on the floor.

"Loser," he was smug about it, as he scooped them up off the floor.

"You cheated. I still win," I folded my arms, pretending to pout while looking down at him. He stood up.

Thunder struck again, I screamed, and I jumped up, landing in Eli's arms.

"Don't worry, it won't hurt you. Are you that terrified of thunder?"

"You have no idea," I said, his body was hot. Usually it's lightly warm, but this time, it was different. His warmth traveled from his body to mine. I felt safe again. I hugged him back, and whispered, "Thanks."

"For?" He asked.

"For saving my life tonight."

"Don't thank me for it. I should be thanking you for being here with me."

"Why?"

"I missed you."

He said those words again, and I didn't know what they meant. My mind was racing, and there were so many different meanings of saying _I missed you _to someone. I didn't want to look into more than it was.

"But we saw each other at school today."

"I know, but that doesn't mean I can't miss you."

"What about Imogen?"

He let me go, "We aren't together."

"She claims you as if you are."

"Well, we're not. If you haven't noticed, she's completely crazy."

"I've noticed, I won't lie. But…" I sighed, "If you want to be with her, it's fine with me. If she doesn't want me around you, I completely understand." I took one step away from him.

He pulled me back, looked into my eyes, and said, "I promise you that I'm not with her. I don't think I'll ever be with her. Have you heard the shit she pulled on me? I told you, remember? She's off her rocker, Fiona. I don't want her."

I forced a smile, trying to please him.

"I know what your fake smile looks like, don't try to fake it with me."

"I'm sorry," I frowned, looking down at the ground awkwardly.

He put his hand on my chin, and lifted it up a bit making me look at him, "Smile. For real this time."

I couldn't do it, I couldn't smile, not right now. I just figured I would fake it again, but this time I would have to be more believable. So, I did.

He let go of me, and I walked into the living room completely forgetting about the mess of glass… he followed.

We sat on the couch, he was still topless, and we were trying to watch TV, but it kept losing signal because of the storm. We just turned off the TV, tired of it resetting every five minutes.

For about fifteen minutes there was an awkward silence until I yawned.

"Tired?" He asked.

"Kind of," I said softly, putting my arm on the couch, and resting my head in my hand.

"You can sleep in my parent's bed," he said as he stood up.

"Oh, okay, thanks."

He took my hand in his, interlocking our fingers, and guided me up the stairs.

"Would you like to borrow a pair of pants?" He asked with a fake English accent, stopping outside of the bedroom door.

I giggled at the way he said it. It was cute. "That would be nice, thank you."

"Well, go inside, take off those things, and I'll be back with something warm…" he cleared his throat quietly, bit his lip and continued, "and dry." As he said this he was looking up, and down my body slowly.

I went inside, and closed the door behind me. I started to take off my skinny jeans, attempting to balance on one leg to pry the wet jeans off my legs. He knocked, and before I could say anything at all, he walked in, and saw me standing on one leg. I got nervous, and fell right in front of him. Feeling my face get hot, I quickly got up, and realized I was standing in just my panties. I reached over, and quickly grabbed the blanket from the bed, and wrapped it around me like a skirt. He started bursting out laughing. I was kind of outraged.

He came in gave me the pajama pants, and teasingly said, "Good luck with putting these on."

I snatched them from his hand, and mockingly said, "Ha, ha, ha, very funny."

He smirked, and left the room, but didn't close the door behind him. I wondered why. I walked over to the door, and closed it.

I walked back to the bed, and I dropped the blanket on the floor to put on the pants. As I hunched over to put the pants on, he walked back into the room before I could get them on.

"I forgot to say g–" He didn't finished his sentence. I jumped on the bed, and covered myself up with the sheet.

"Good night?" He said, confused, as if he didn't know what happened. Which is kind of fishy because from the time he walked in to the time he left, he was smiling as if he did it on purpose.

"Night!" I said quickly, and unintentionally loud.

He shut the door, and I flopped down on my back, and groaned loudly. "Ugh" Why must I always embarrass myself in front of this guy? Why does he make every situation awkward, but somehow in a good way?

I said, (loud enough for him to hear) "That Eli, incorrigible!"

I heard a loud _ha_ coming from Eli, as if he were saying, _she knows I did it on purpose._

I looked up at the ceiling, and heard feet shuffling through the hallway. I could see Eli's shadow through the bottom crack of the door. I didn't hear his bedroom door open or close. I wondered what he was doing, and if he even went to bed.

I stayed up for the next half hour thinking about what had just happened, and what happened earlier that night, counting how many times I embarrassed myself. I started counting on my fingers.

1... 2... 3... 4... No, stop counting. It isn't making anything easier. I took a deep breath, unable to sleep. Out of nowhere, while I was in deep thought, I heard an extremely loud **BOOM**. It was thunder. I screamed, and the door flew open (surprisingly fast, as if he were right by my door).

"Are you okay!" He asked in panic.

"Fine… I think. Just scared, sorry for waking you…" I said softly.

"I wasn't asleep, don't worry."

"Uh…" I didn't have a thing to say to that.

He was standing at the foot of the bed, shirtless, and in his boxers. I blushed, and giggled, looking down at them. I was flabbergasted at the thought that they were white, and had duckies on them.

"Nice boxers," I said with a giggle.

"Aren't they! They're just soooo cute." He said in a valley-girl tone.

"Stop, okay. J–just stop. Don't ever do that again."

"Why?" He kept talking like that, teasing me.

"It isn't normal for you."

"It isn't normal for Fiona Coyne to be in my house half-naked, sleeping in my parents bed, but I let that one slide, now, didn't I?"

"What if I said it was normal?"

He raised on eyebrow, then winked at me. I blushed yet again.

"So, are you okay?" He asked again.

"Yeah, fine, just kind of jumpy. I'll be okay," I exhaled.

"Do you want some company until you fall asleep?"

I didn't reply, I just stared down at the covers. Before I knew it, he was getting under the covers with me, and lying down.

I slid over to give him more room.

"Don't worry, I don't have cooties… today."

I laughed softly, "No, it's not that."

"What is it then?"

"I'm just giving you more room, that's all."

"What if I don't want more room?" He moved his eyebrow up and down, flirting with me, I could tell.

"What does that mean?" I asked, my voice squeaking.

"Uh… come closer, duh," he faced me, as I was sitting up, turning over on his side; "Just lie down, get comfortable, and go to sleep. You need it. It's been a long night for the both of us."

I slid down, getting on my back.

"I'll just stay here till you fall asleep, that's all."

"Night, Eli," I said sleepily, and before I knew it I was in deep slumber.

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><p><strong>And there you have it. A perfect beginning to the perfect Feli story. But don't fret, it's not over yet. I just rhymed! (I just thought of Imogen just now, and I temporarily scared myself.)<strong>


	2. Walking On Broken Glass

**A/N: **I _really _hope the majority of you who read the first chapter liked it. And if you didn't flame me or anything, it's appreciated – greatly appreciated.

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><p>The next morning I awoke with Eli's arm around my stomach, right on my belly-button. I didn't move his arm because it was kind of comforting. I lied there, listening to his quiet snores for about half an hour. I started thinking about last night's events, how they made me feel. I couldn't explain, even if someone pointed a gun to my head, and told me to explain it or die, I'd probably die. It's one of those things where you know how it feels inside, but there is no possible way you could project those feelings into human words. Maybe in some kind of alien language, but definitely not any language on this planet.<p>

I remembered all the broken glass, and right as I thought of it, Eli's hand moved upward, and stopped right under my right breast, I bit down on my lip. My heart skipped a beat. I looked at his hand, and it was still dressed in my now ruined shirt. I gently removed it, and I saw that all the cuts were covered in dry blood. I felt so bad for him. He's always hurting himself or doing things that get him in trouble, and I felt sorry for him. No one was there to even comfort him, which was sad. I knew how he felt. I don't think I've ever really had someone comfort me before. Holly J did, but it wasn't the same. It wasn't the loving comfort I needed from someone.

I lifted his hand carefully, and slide out of bed. I stood up, and realized my pants weren't on all the way. I tried to remember if I had fell asleep this way or if they just happened to come off during the night. Did I really move so much in my sleep, that my pants would slide off? It was a possibility because his pants were kind of big on me. But still, not likely. I thought about it for a moment, and recalled that I jumped into bed before I could even get my pants on. I laughed at myself a little bit as I pulled them up. I began creeping slowly, and quietly across the bedroom, to go downstairs.

While I tiptoed down the stairs, they creaked, and I cringed, hoping I wouldn't wake Eli up. I looked at the wall, and saw pictures of him, and his family. He looked so happy around them. I came across a picture of him by himself, and he was smiling. I traced his smile with my fingertips, and a smile formed on my face, too. I loved when he smiled. Seeing it always made me feel like everything was really going to be okay. Always. Every time I saw him smiling I knew I had to smile, too. Something about him, and his lips curving up like they did made me want to smile even when life was hard, even if I was having a bad day. I shook my head, from being kind of lost in the picture, and came back into reality. I quickly ran downstairs, and entered the kitchen.

When I got into the kitchen I saw glass everywhere on the floor, and drips of Eli's blood was caked onto the shards. I saw half of a hand print of blood on the counter. I bit my lip as I looked around the kitchen, thinking what I could use to put the glass in. I looked through cabinets, drawers, and finally I found some garbage bags. I got down on my hands and knees, starting to pick up the big pieces first. It seemed that with every other piece I kept getting tiny slivers in my delicate skin. They kept going deeper, and deeper. And although it hurt, I wanted to clean this mess up for Eli. He was already cut once, he didn't need it again. (Plus, I figured after I was done here, I could attempt to make him breakfast.) I had so many pieces in my skin, I had lost count.

Finally, after spending at least 45 minutes picking up every single slice of glass, and cleaning up Eli's blood, I tried to pick up the garbage bag, but it was extremely heavy. I used all my might to pick it up, and each time I grunted.

"Ugh!"

I figured that I wasn't using my knees to pick it up like someone smart would do. So, I attempted this. I used as much strength as I had, and got a good grip on the bag. I lifted it up, and for a moment I was really proud of myself. Then the unexpected happened…

**CRASH!**

The bag ripped. And all of the glass fell out from the bottom.

"FUCK!" I screamed, and I heard loud footsteps running above me, and down the stairs. It was Eli.

And right before he stepped on the last stair, he tripped, hit his toe on the banister, and screamed, "FUCK!"

He got up, took a deep breath, and noticed all the broken glass.

"What are you doing?"

"I was trying to clean," I said softly, frowning a bit as I looked at the floor; glancing up at him a little.

He smirked, "Come on," He grabbed my wrist gently, "let's go play doctor."

My eyes widened, "What!"

Before he replied to my squeaky outburst, he dragged me upstairs, and into the bathroom.

"I said, let's go play doctor."

He lead me into the bathroom, "Sit," he demanded, as he opened the medicine cabinet.

"Where?"

"On the counter," he replied.

Even though I'm tall, I was still having trouble hopping onto the counter top.

In the corner of his eye, he saw that I had been struggling.

He softly chuckled, I gave him a slight glare in a playful manor, "Having issues?"

"Is it that obvious?" I sighed, smiling a bit.

"Here," he placed his hands on my waist, and gently lifted me up on the counter; smiling at me as he looked into my eyes for a moment. He looked away from me, and went back to gathering what he needed.

I sat there, and waited for a few minutes with my legs dangling over the counter's edge. Eli took some peroxide, tweezers, cotton balls, and bandages out of the cabinet, and put them on the counter. He offered his hand to me. I just stared at his hand for a moment.

"Let me see," he said firmly.

"Okay…" I slowly reached out my hand, "but don't hurt me, okay?"

He smiled reassuringly, "I would never."

I placed my hand in his palm, he picked up the tweezers, and started to take out the shards. Every time the tweezers touched my skin I hissed in pain.

"Ow!" I whined.

"Stop being a baby," he said, playfully.

"I'm not a baby," I reacted under my breath.

"Just let me take care of you, okay?"

"Fine," I said.

"Fine," he replied with a smug smile, as if he had won.

I sat there for a awhile, wincing in pain every once in a while. He opened the bottle of peroxide, and used the cotton balls to gently clean the wounds. He finished "playing doctor" with me, and kissed my hand.

"All better," he smiled, I smiled back.

Suddenly, it got quiet – too quiet. We stayed there in silence for a bit, until I attempted to say something.

I opened my mouth, ready to break the silence, and he quickly asked, "Can I ask you a serious question?"

"Umm…" I paused for a moment, "Sure, of course, anything."

"Why where you going to jump?" He asked with a low, but serious tone.

"Charlie," was all I said, and just like that I was covering my mouth, and looking down, trying to hide my pain, and tears. He lifted me off the counter, and wrapped his arms around me softly.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He whispered in my ear. His voice was filled with a thick concern.

I hesitated for a minute or so, thinking of whether or not I should tell him or just come up with some other kind of excuse. After all, to some people my excuse would probably sound stupid. It wasn't a very good excuse to want to end my life. I figured I could tell Eli anything, and he wouldn't judge me.

As I spoke, I kept choking on my words, "She left me because of the mistakes I've made," I sniffled, choking more, "It's not my fault that," I stuttered.

"Th–that I'm an al–alcoho–"

"Take a deep breath," he calmed me.

I took a deep, and heavy breath, and exhaled.

"Fiona," Eli sighed, "you are a beautiful, talented, smart, funny girl, and if that Charlie chick is going to pass up someone as perfect as you then she doesn't deserve you at all, you don't want to be with someone like that – someone who takes advantage of your emotions. You're amazing, and don't let her make you believe you don't have a life worth living."

As he talked, as he gave me the speech I've never had before, I was biting my lip hard, taking long, deep breaths just so I wouldn't bawl like a baby.

He wrapped his arms around me again. I rested my head on his shoulder, and finally let out a loud, and blubbering sob that was begging to get out of me. I don't cry in front of people, I never have, and a few days ago I didn't think I ever would. My whole self-respect at that moment just flew out the window. I didn't care if he saw me cry, I held in those tears for far too long. It felt good to release them.

Slowly, but surely, the more he held me close to him; so close I heard his breathing, and heard his heart beat; the more I felt at home, and it seemed like he made the weight lift off my shoulders with just one simple hug. I didn't want to let him go, and he didn't even pull away or hint that he wanted me to.

The feeling came back, the feeling I thought had gone away. It was back, and my heart sank into my stomach. My stomach felt queasy, kind of like butterflies, but this was a way better feeling; something like… pterodactyls, maybe? Okay, maybe that wouldn't _physically_ feel better, but that's how I felt at the time. Suddenly, it came to me. It was the same exact feeling that I had with Charlie. The same thing. I began to panic, but not too bad or obvious. I mean, I am a _lesbian_… right?

"You know what's funny?" Eli whispered in my ear.

"H- w-what?" I stuttered, trying to seem like normal, although inside I was screaming something along the lines of, _I like you, Elijah Goldsworthy!_

"I really, really," he paused dramatically; and my heart sank, "have to pee."

The shocked, scared, yet lovely feeling left, and I shook my head, letting out a gentle laugh, "Well, I should leave then. I should probably get back home before Mama Bear gets back."

He lifted an eyebrow, "Are you sure? You don't _have _to leave, you know."

"I know, and I thank you for the hospitality, but I shouldn't be a burden," I breathed.

"You're not a…" he took a deep breath, " your far from it, Fi,"

Inside I felt like such a burden on him. He saved my life, stopped me from doing something stupid, and insane; he let me spend the night at his house, let me borrow his clothes. Either he was lonely from his parents being gone, and needed the company or for some reason he truly cared. I'd like to think that he did care for me.

"So, please, just stay," he removed his hands from my shoulders, and a frown formed on his face; which I hated, "unless you really want to go, then I won't stop you."

"I want to stay, I really do, Eli, but…" I drifted off.

"But what?"

"I don't want to be a burden. I don't want to bother you with anymore of my issues than I already have, you might say I'm not, but I feel like I am, Eli," I took a deep breath, saying it quickly.

He chuckled, "For the last time, you are not a burden, and never could be. So just shut up, go downstairs, and I'll make you breakfast."

Just as he said the word breakfast, my stomach growled, we both laughed softly. He started walking down the stairs, and I yelled to him, "I thought you had to pee?"

"Oh… right…" I giggled as he ran back up the stairs.

I walked out the door, and headed downstairs. I heard the door shut, but I had this feeling that someone was watching me. I didn't dare look back because what if he really was looking at me? I was already nervous around him enough. I didn't want it to be awkward. Eli was a great friend to me, and I didn't want anything to ruin what we had. I decided then that I wasn't going to say a thing to him about how I felt. I promised myself I wouldn't. I couldn't … I'm suppose to be a lesbian… right?

After breakfast, (Eli made me delicious French Toast) I wanted to change out of my Eli-wear, but I realized the only clothes I had were either ripped or still soaked from the rain from the night before. I felt foul because of my lack of cleanliness. I'm a usually squeaky-clean kind of person, so it's understandable that I felt the way I did.

"Hey, umm…" I paused, setting down my glass of orange juice, "I don't mean to be a bother, but is it possible for me to get a ride home? I want to take a shower, get some clothes, and some other things, you know, get clean."

Eli chuckled, "Yeah, sure…" he drifted off, "But you're coming back, right? You're not trying to escape my clutches or anything?"

I laughed, shaking my head, "No, of course not," I cleared my throat, "I'd never dream of that."

He smiled in satisfaction, "Good, well, let me get dressed."

He was still in his boxers.

He continued, "And I'll have you over there in no time." He looked back and smirked. And finished up the stairs.


	3. Leather and Lace

As I waited for Eli to finish getting ready to take me over to my apartment, I was sitting in the living, watching TV – Spongebob, to be exact, and thinking when he was going to be finished. I started thinking about what I needed to bring over his house. I needed to shower, that was for sure, I needed deodorant, clothes, toothbrush... and just as I was going through the list in my head, Eli came out of the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around his waist.

My jaw dropped. I tried not to look, but I couldn't help it. He walked across the living room over the the side table on the other side of the sofa, and picked up his necklace. He walked passed me again, and smirked on his way back to the bathroom.

I paused, thought, and looked around the room shocked, yet completely dumbfounded. What was that all about? I bet you anything he purposely did that. Attention hog... but really, really cute. I saw him topless for the second time, and this time I was even more embarrassed than before. I think the reason why I was blushing harder than the first time was because at least he had pants on the first time. He was naked under that towel. NAKED!

Eli came out of the bathroom – clothed this time – and smirked at me as I stared at him unintentionally.

"What?" He asked, almost laughing.

"Nothing, nothing at all," I said rather quickly.

"Okay..." he chuckled softly, "ready to go?"

"Yeah, I'm ready, let's go," I replied nervously, and got up quickly to the door.

Eli grabbed the keys off the hook by the front door, and quickly locked it. He rushed over to his motorcycle, which I was already on.

**27 Minutes Later**

We arrived at my house, the ride over was pretty silent for some reason I couldn't understand. From what I know Eli's pretty talkative, especially when he's around people he's comfortable with. Something wasn't right. Eli didn't seem like, well, Eli. I didn't bother asking, I didn't want to bother him. If something was wrong I'm sure Eli, and I were close enough to where he'd tell me if it was a big deal, even a small deal he would've said something.

We both walked side-by-side into the complex. We took the elevator upstairs in silence... again. The silence was killing me, but I shrugged it off. Maybe nothing was wrong at all, I was probably just being... paranoid or something.

The elevator stopped at my floor, I stepped out, and discovered that the door to my apartment was wide open. At first I didn't panic, maybe Mom came for a visit. As I was walking quickly to the door, with Eli following, it dawned on me that Mom was at a spa in the Caribbean, there was no possible way she would've been at the apartment now. When it came to my mind, I walked quicker to the door, afraid I might've been robbed.

Before I could walk through the door Eli stepped in front of me, "Wait," he put his hand on my stomach, pushing me back gently, "Let me go in first... just in case."

He slowly stepped through the door way, and looked around cautiously.

"Don't make a single movement until I've searched the place, okay?" I just nodded, agreeing with him.

As he went deeper inside of the apartment I was thinking of how protective, and caring he was. He was intelligent, funny, he had this thing to him that was just him. You couldn't find an Eli-esque in anyone else besides Eli. He was special. He was one of a kind, and I realized how lucky I was to have known him – to have him be my friend. It was beyond my logic why girls just don't sweep him up whenever he was single. I was surprised no one tried to snatch him when him, and Clare had broken up not too long ago.

I was lost in thought of him when he came back to me.

"It's clear, no one's around, but if I were you I'd check around, just to see if anything's missing or not," he said, leaning against the door frame.

I started walking in, but he blocked me from going inside.

"I can't check if you won't let me in," I scoffed.

A smirk curved on his lips, "What's the password?"

I groaned in frustration, "Eli!"

"Close. It's actually Eli's the most attractive person on the planet, but I guess I could let this one slide."

I hit his arm playfully, "Move."

He laughed, moving out of the way, "You may enter."

I laughed, and walked in, he followed, and closed the door behind him. I started going into various rooms, checking every bit of it to see if anything was stolen. Fortunately, nothing was. I stopped, and thought for a moment how the door could've became unlocked.

The memory came back to me from the night before. In the stress, and frustration of the trouble with Charlie... Charlie... I thought of her, and I didn't miss her. I didn't want to be with her, I didn't have that longing for her affection anymore. I smiled, satisfied. I remembered in the rush of last night, I didn't close the door nor lock it obviously. It was my fault, but thankfully no one decided to waltz in, and take anything.

I came back into the living room, and Eli was still standing in the middle of the living room, his hands in his pockets, looking around the place, just analyzing it.

I smiled at him, "You know, you could just sit down, you don't have to stand there," I chuckled.

"Is anything missing?" He asked.

"No, thankfully, no, nothing's gone," I responded, followed by a sigh of relief.

"Well, make yourself at home, I'm going to go pack some things, I won't be long."

He nodded, and sat down on the couch, leaned forward, and grabbed the remote from the coffee table in front of him. I stood there secretly watching him, and once again I felt creepy. I walked into my room, and grabbed a bag from my closet. I began filling the bag with various articles of clothing.

I didn't know what to bring, really. I didn't know whether we were staying inside his house all day or we were actually going somewhere together. I just about took everything out of my closet, and drawers, preparing for every occasion. I felt stupid for some reason I couldn't explain. I just had this gnawing in my brain saying things like, _"Fiona, you're ridiculous"_ or _"That would never happen,"_ _"Why are you taking all of these, stupid?"_

I walked out into the living room, dressed in something other than Eli's pajamas. I decided to wear a leather skirt instead of pants this time, it was sunny out, although the air was cold, but I thought I could deal. I wore a top that went slightly past my hips, it was black, and I loved it more than any other top I had. I was just comfortable in it. It was hard to find something that was fashionable, yet comfortable. I decided that I needed to get used to a new pair of black leather boots I bought only a few weekends ago, but didn't have a chance to wear them. They were black, they had heels, and were also very, extremely comfortable.

"Ready?"

Eli took his vision away from the TV, and looked at me. His jaw clenched, and he was trying hard not to move his eyes up, and down my body.

"Uh..." his voice went suddenly high-pitched, "Yeah, I am."

I chuckled, walking towards the door.

He jumped up off the couch, and grabbed my bag from my hand, "No, I got it."

"You sure?"

"Yeah," he smiled, "Yeah, I am."

He stood there with my bag in his hands near the door, "Ladies first."

"Elijah Goldsworthy, a gentleman? The shock!" I joked, he laughed softly.

"Yes, Elijah Goldsworthy can be a gentleman," he paused, "Now, if you don't get out of this apartment by yourself, I'll pick you up and carry you out myself."

"Is that a threat?"

He winked, "No, it's a promise."

My cheeks flushed. I just stood in the doorway, not budging. I really wanted to know if he really would do something like that. So, what other way to know this for sure is to test him?

I smirked, "No, I'm not moving."

"Move," he demanded.

"No."

He glared at me, "I know what you're doing..."

"Me?" I looked around, as if I thought he was talking to someone else, "What am I doing so wrong?" I asked innocently.

He smirked, "Fine."

Before I knew it he swooped me up over his shoulder, my waist rested upon his broad shoulders. I struggled at first, playfully hitting his back, and flinging my legs around. He laughed, gripping onto my waist harder.

We reached his motorcycle, and before he put me down, a hard gush of wind flew by us. I suddenly felt my skirt fly up, I wiggled in his grip furiously, trying to get down by myself.

"What's your problem?" Eli asked playfully.

"My... uh... never mind," I stuttered.

He looked over, and my face went red. He saw my panties. How embarrassing. He quickly put me down, his face was red, too. I fixed my skirt in a rush, and readjusted myself.

"So... uh..." he started.

"Don't, don't say a single word..." my face grew into a deep crimson.

He covered his mouth, but I knew he was laughing at me.

"Shall we go?" He asked, his voice shaky from the laughter.

"Please."

As we were heading back to Eli's house I was thinking about how much more I could embarrass myself in front of this guy. I couldn't possibly think of anything I could do that was more embarrassing than him seeing my panties for the... second time? Yeah, second time. He had even seen me in my bra. I never used to embarrass myself like this before him. Never. And I was thinking about maybe it's a sign of something. Maybe my feelings for him are more genuine than they've ever been with anyone. Bobby, Charlie, it was just some sort of puppy love, I think. Eli's different from them – he's better than them.

I must've been over thinking my feelings for him longer than I thought. We arrived at his house quickly – too fast actually.

"Do you mind if I take a shower?" I asked Eli as soon as we walked into the house.

He nodded, "Yeah, of course," he smiled.

"Thanks," I grabbed my bag off the floor, where he had put it, and headed upstairs.


	4. Sorry

I'd hate to say it, but Edge of Seventeen is in a major crisis, and therefore must go on hiatus until further notice. And yes, I am fully aware I might lose readers because of this, and for that I am sorry. For some reason, as you can tell, this story is taking me forever to finish or even post a new chapter. As soon as I can get some inspiration, I will continue this story.

I am terribly sorry for this, I truly am.

Sincerely,  
>iKillFanGirlsForFun (Shelby) <p>


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